By Tanya Connor
The Catholic Free Press
Lectoring at the closing Mass at St. Bernard Parish in Fitchburg in 2010, Maureen Hayes found it hard to hold back tears.
“Everybody was distraught” upon learning that their parish was being merged with St. Camillus de Lellis Parish across the city, she said recently. Their church building at 228 Water St. was being closed and the new parish (named St. Bernard’s) would use St. Camillus’ church at 333 Mechanic St..
“I’m not going to go there,” some people said.
The first weekend after the merger, the pastor had members of both parishes welcoming people as they came to Mass, and “it’s been beautiful ever since,” Ms . Hayes said. That pastor, still there, is Father Joseph M. Dolan, who had been St. Camillus’ pastor.
“We have a lot of ministries,” said Ms. Hayes, the safe environment coordinator. “The people are so warm and giving. … Everybody’s ready to help. … I couldn’t even think of going anywhere else. … I truly believe this merge was meant to be.” If someone isn’t happy, she doesn’t know about it, she said.
She’s not the only person whose sorrow has been turned to joy.
“It was very difficult,” said Jacquelyn Vickery, who’d belonged to the former St. Bernard’s. But at the new parish she found old friends “and Father Joe makes it very easy.” Also helpful was the prayer shawl ministry she joined, in which members pray for the sick and knit and crochet shawls and lap blankets for them.
Roberta Fiore also found change hard when her parish, Madonna of the Holy Rosary, was part of a different Fitchburg merger.
She returned to St. Camillus, the church of her youth, at the invitation of her friend Holly Reynolds.
Mrs. Reynolds said she felt bad for friends who had to leave their church buildings, but happy to see them at St. Camillus, her church. She and Mrs. Fiore are also members of the prayer shawl ministry, which the co-chairwomen say expanded after the merge.
Mary Lotze, the co-chairwoman from the former St. Bernard’s, said she got involved because she thought the ministry would nurture those pained by their church’s closing.
Kathy Jordan, a St. Bernard parishioner later hired for youth ministry at St. Camillus, said she started the prayer shawl ministry and, after the merger, got others to lead it.
Rose Norton, the co-chair woman from St. Camillus, said about a dozen people, roughly half from each former parish, meet the third Wednesday of each month.
“They’ve all gotten to be good friends,” she said. A shut-in knits rectangles designed by another parishioner, to which a medal and note are attached, for people receiving sacraments. Father Dolan blesses their handiwork, which they hear brings much comfort.
The parish also helps others through its outreach program, chaired by Deacon John J. Aliskevicz, one of the three permanent deacons. He said eucharistic ministers take Communion to nursing homes, and he and Father Dolan offer Communion services or Masses at a hospital. A certified chaplain, Deacon Aliskevicz also runs a bereavement support group and does pastoral counseling for individuals.
The outreach program extends to Haiti. Working with nuns there, parishioners sponsor students, and pack and deliver backpacks of supplies to them, the deacon said.
Outreach is internal too. Deacon Aliskevicz said he thought that what made the merger successful was that Father Dolan and the staff were sensitive to the fact that each parish lost something, whether part of its identity or its church building.
“You’ve got to mourn the loss, and that’s what we tried to do,” he said.
And, he said, “I think to get people together, we have to get them together to have fun. Do something joyous as a team and then, when the work comes, it’ll get done. The thing you need is patience.”
One of the biggest successes has been the parish barbecue, he said.
It was the first event of the combined parish, and set the tone for everything, said Mrs. Jordan, now head of the women’s group “Daughters of Divine Mercy” and an instructor for the Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults. St. Camillus had scheduled the barbecue. After learning of the merger plans, they invited St. Bernard’s parishioners to join the planning committee. Fifty came, she said.
“We found something for everybody to do, and that was part of the fun and part of the welcoming,” she said.
The barbecue that formerly drew about 120 people brought in 340, she said.
Mass attendance rose too.
“The first Mass was…packed,” Mrs. Jordan said. “It was full of spirit. And as people were exiting I heard people saying, ‘That was amazing; I never heard singing so loud.’ … People didn’t realize who belonged to which parish.”
The merger wasn’t completely smooth, Mrs. Jordan said. But people helped make it work.
“Father Dolan really navigated all the people of the city to help them understand that they were welcome here and that God was at each church and it was up to them to find the new home they wanted to be in,” she said.
“Before St. Bernard’s came over to our house,” he wanted to make sure St. Camillus members would be welcoming. “It’s not like there wasn’t any natural grieving going on for the loss of their parish.” But they embraced the inevitable and got involved and now “we are a thriving parish.”