Sister of Life: People made to give, receive love

By Anna Moran
Special to The CFP

On March 29 in the Rehm Library at the College of the Holy Cross, the Students for Life and the Society of Saints Peter and Paul co-hosted a talk from the Sisters of Life called “Loved and Made to Love.”
The Sisters of Life, like other Catholic sisters, take vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience; however, they also take an additional vow to “protect and enhance the sacredness of every human life.” Though abortion, like much else in our world today, has become a hotbed for angry political debates, the speaker, Sister Maria Regina, spoke about it with genuine love and gentleness. Not once did she make a judgmental remark about women who have had abortions, nor about anyone who disagrees with her. Her message was that each person is made to give and receive love. She was able to speak on a contentious issue with a grace that has become very rare.
Sister Maria Regina began her speech by focusing on what it means to be loved and to receive love. In keeping with the Sisters’ belief that “every person’s life has deep meaning, purpose and worth,” she reminded her listeners that God created each one of them, knowing and loving each thing about them. She cited fun traits that God knows and loves, like an individual’s sense of humor or freckles.
She then told a story about her niece who likes to wear flowing dresses and spin around saying, “Just look at me!” This invitation, Sister Maria suggested, voices the desire of every human heart, a desire that is fulfilled by God. He looks at each person just as parents look at their newborn babies: with delight. He must then find ways to communicate this love to us. She shared an anecdote about a friend of the Sisters’ who is a priest, who was trying to extend a consoling and loving hand to a woman who was feeling down about herself. However, there was a language barrier that made communication more difficult. He made the sign of the cross over her, and from her warm reaction he felt his message was effectively communicated. Sister Maria recalled how the cross is a sign to each person that he is chosen, good, and blessed, and how the priest’s efforts mirror those of God as he tries to effectively and creatively communicate to us that we are loved and that we are good.
Following these positive messages, she then acknowledged the “mess in the world and in ourselves.” Sister Maria recalled that something went wrong in the world, laughing that this statement is perhaps a gross understatement of reality, and that we must now live with real sin and suffering. She continued by saying that God’s response to this badness in the world was to take it all upon himself on the cross. Sister Maria asserted that the cross guarantees two things: that we are loved infinitely, and that we have the capacity to love infinitely.
Sister Maria then discussed what it means to give love. She began by citing Vatican II: “man cannot fully find himself except through a sincere gift of himself.” With this paradox in mind, she told a story from her pro-life ministry. Sister Maria shared that a woman, “we will call her Jenna,” was pregnant, and the father of the child as well as her family wanted her to get an abortion. Jenna had an abortion in the past and did not want to suffer through another one, and she came to the Sisters asking if there was another way out. She asked how she would know the Sisters would truly help, and she was put in touch with a woman they had helped before. This woman, who lived with the Sisters during her pregnancy, shared a message with her: “God chose you to be a mother to this child.” This message stayed with Jenna, and she had her baby. She was so thankful to the Sisters and to the woman with whom she spoke that she asked to be the one who speaks to the next woman who comes in. Alicia, a 19-year-old whose family was encouraging an abortion, called and spoke to Jenna. Jenna said, “I’ve made both decisions, and there is not a day that goes by that I do not think about my first baby. You cannot make a decision based on what other people are telling you to do because they forget about it the next day, but you live with it for the rest of your life.”
Sister Maria connected this story to the theme of “Loved and Made to Love” because it illustrates how a person can be touched by another’s kindness and help, and then feel a desire to extend this same kindness to someone else.
Sister Maria shared a story from when she was in Poland speaking to a young man, and she asked him: “What was the most beautiful thing you have seen?” He responded that it was the mutual giving of the self that he witnessed between his parents when his father was diagnosed with cancer. His mom rearranged the house so it was easier and more comfortable for him to get around, she changed her cooking to fit his dietary needs, etc. He also noticed that his dad was fighting to stay alive more for her than for himself. Sister Maria pointed out that what we learn from this story is that love does not shy away from the crosses of others: it means leaning in when things get hard. She then referenced “The Lord of the Rings,” saying that Sam shows us this love by telling Frodo, “I can’t carry [the ring] for you, but I can carry you.” The  message is that we cannot carry the cross of another, but we can help them through it by being loving.
Although the fliers for this pro-life talk incited some skeptical remarks across campus, the talk itself communicated a message of love that was far from insidious or divisive. The message, of course, was directed to a largely Catholic audience; however, the general message that one’s life is endowed with intrinsic meaning, and that each person is loved and can love, can be applied to anyone’s life. The message of the giving of oneself, especially as communicated by the story of the young Polish man’s parents, is another lesson that anyone can hear and be touched by.
One last story that beautifully illustrates the giving of oneself is the story of Chiara Corbella Petrillo, frequently called “a saint for our times.” She was a young Italian mother who suffered through the death of two of her babies, but still had a third. During her pregnancy, she was diagnosed with cancer. She refused treatment until her son was born because she did not want any harm to come to him. She delivered her son before succumbing to the cancer. She endured great suffering, but is reported as being joyful throughout the suffering because it was for the protection of her child. This story parallels that of the Polish boy because it shows people finding joy even amidst horrible suffering because of love and self sacrifice. No matter how one feels about abortion, stories like these, and a speech like Sister Maria’s, can hopefully be appreciated by anyone because they reveal moments of selfless love in our world.

– Anna Moran is a sophomore at the College of the Holy Cross (class of 2024) with a double major in English and Spanish. She lives in Springfield.